I had a dream the other night, taking me back to a street in a town that I grew up on. In the dream I encountered several people from my much younger days and they were all anxious to greet me, a reunion of sorts. One of the first to embrace me was a family member who came in for “the kiss.” In my dream I turned my cheek just in the nick of time, avoiding the mouth kiss and his lips landed on my temple, a feat I have yet to accomplish in real life. I recounted this dream to a dear friend, and she shared that she has the same awkward moment when greeting someone she is close to, but not someone she wants to lock lips with.
We laughed about it, but it made me wonder about this situation that makes us both uncomfortable, and why we are unable to avoid it.
What is it that makes someone kiss someone other than their significant other on the mouth? Is it a holdover from another generation or era? I thought so when my husband would complain that an aunt of mine would do the same to him when they met. But the two people my friend and I suffer kisses from are the same generation as us, so maybe it is a practice that was acceptable at one time, but certainly not now. And as my husband’s experience proves, it’s not just men kissing women, both genders feel it appropriate. So how to avoid the next encounter? Personally, I found myself devising ways to avoid the kiss even before I’ve arrived for a visit. I visualize myself saying hello with a table between us, sticking out my hand for a shake, or purposefully saying hello to anyone else in the room so I can present the side of my face during the incoming face plant. When it comes time to embrace, however, I can’t bring myself to do any of these things. I endure it with my eyes closed and receive the quick peck. At least it’s over within seconds and we haven’t shared any spit. Maybe the next time we meet, rather than think up ways to contort my body to avoid “the kiss,” I’ll woman-up and Just. Say. No, thank you. Here’s a How-to I found on the Internet that might help. https://www.wikihow.com/Refuse-a-Kiss. In any case, wish me luck.